Smoked Turkey Legs (1997 Chevy 1 Ton Dually Tahoe Long Bed Bullshit Thing)

I have been ready to blow like Mount St. Helens since the weekend of January 19th, 2013.

Why, you ask? Because although Barrett-Jackson was a blast and I saw a lot of really cool cars and got to hang out with the guys and make fun of everything and generally just be an asshole, there is a flip side- I’ve seen about all the 60’s muscle cars I can handle for the rest of my life, I hurt my foot, and worst of all, I got duped into buying a twelve dollar turkey leg.

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America: King of Class and Style (lifted Dodge truck)

If it doesn’t excel at being a street truck, an offroad truck, or a hauling truck.. what are you left with?  Just another stereotype at the gym.

When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong

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I came across these two trucks parked next to each other at the Happy Valley Wal-Mart last night. I find the dichotomy of the two trucks pretty interesting.

First off, we’ve got the white 9th Gen F-series. It’s probalby my favorite body style for a 4×4 truck, and probably my least favorite as a 2wd. But here, it looks great. It’s riding on 35s, which to me, stuck in my Jeep forums, are massive. I think 35’s are the perfect size for a full-size truck though, 33s look a little goofy, and any larger than 35s, and well, you’re just a dickhead. The billet grill is a little dated (although acceptable on a legit 90s vehicle) but the Daylighters show actual off-road intent, since they aren’t part of some half-ass prerunner light bar thing that’s just for looks. I also see some decent suspension work under the truck, however, the owner is still rocking (or attempting to rock) the factory Twin-Traction Beam front end setup, which is… how can I put this gently… a total piece of shit. He needs to swap a solid axle in there.

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The Rice Report – Anamorphic Accord

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Welcome back to the Rice Report: your up-to-the-minute guide to the exciting and confusing phenomenon of the ricer resurgence as of late!

Before I begin, I would like to apologize for the poor quality of the photos. I think my camera must have a special mode that I don’t know about. I was able to see this car perfectly fine in person, but for some reason whenever I tried to take a picture of it, it came out terrible and grainy. I really believe my camera was trying to protect me from ever having to see this car again. Anyways, on to the car.

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All Fucks Given (Chevy Malibu)

Your font hurts my eyes and your little phrase hurts my brain. I spotted this thing at NAU, assume what you will.