It’s Still 2003, Somewhere

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Apparently this far into our modern futuristic world they still sell hair gel, some men still use bleach only for the ends of said gelled hair, and I’m pretty sure Wal-Mart still stocks those stupid Gilligan hats, somewhere. This Miata is for that person. The person that thinks that Disturbed is the most modern form of aggressive music, and that phones with color displays are quite fancy.

I mean look at this thing with it’s unpainted aftermarket rear spoiler, puffy side cladding, fart can muffler, universal wheels and (most importantly) the “sponsor list” decal of companies down the front quarter. I feel like it might be used to travel back in time, considering I got a picture of it only a few months ago.

One day you’ll experience this vehicle like your father does of his generation’s poorly modified vehicles: Chuckling almost fondly at it’s testorone-fuel childhood stupidity when a 70’s midsize goes down the road with it’s Cragar brand rear wheels sticking out past the body and the ass-end jacked sky high via air-shocks. It’s smog-choked motor pumping a popping, gurgling, rasp from it’s 2″ crush bent exhaust system into glass pack mufflers that dump under the car.

Now we have a new breed of ricer, so this look you see above is just another moment in time. If you see another one haunting the streets in 20 years from now – instead of the 10 years we’re celebrating now – be sure to chuckle at it and remind yourself that your friends were dumb asses.

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4 thoughts on “It’s Still 2003, Somewhere

  1. You are just jealous, Japanese cars rule and you know, long life to the JDM and Hiroshima is a winner. The rest are just haters and assassins. Sell your TV and buy a book… little boy!

    • Well James, I must assume by the massive amounts of butthurt (try Preparation H next time) that I must be criticizing your car above. Let me respond to your comment (with sentences English speakers can actually understand):

      Many Japanese cars do rule. The Miata is actually a great car exactly as it came from the factory. The modifications you see above do more harm than good in almost every instance. The body kit adds unnecessary weight, as does the wing. The wheels probably add weight, which if you didn’t know (might want to check one of those book things you were talking about) are considered “unsprung mass” and is even more detrimental for performance.

      The ridiculous exhaust and stickers likely don’t affect performance, but you can bet they make the car look much stupider. Any one that thinks otherwise is a Ricer or Juggalo. Judging by your affinity for the above car and rhetoric of “haters and assassins” I’ll take a wild guess and say you’re both.

      Sell your Miata and buy a Corolla. It’s time you made tasteless modifications to a car that deserved it. I’m sure all the stuff you tacked on to this poor car will fit on the Toyota, and will improve your chances of selling the Miata to people that don’t still wear over sized ball-chain necklaces.

      BTW, I really appreciate you being our first troll. It’s a landmark for us and our website.

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