Big Hat, No Cattle: Riced Out Ford Taurus

I have heard that in Texas, the expression “big hat, no cattle” refers to someone who looks important but has suspect credentials. They might talk big but fail to come through or produce results that are in line with their appearance. This person might also be called a show-off, a braggart, or a fraud.

I would say that “big hat, no cattle” definitely applies to this Ford Taurus – especially since Taurus is the Latin word for “bull.” With its body kit and its dual exhaust cutouts, it might be appear to be a pretty fast car. Sadly, I have to call it out for not having any “go” to back up the “show.”

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The Rice Report – Anamorphic Accord

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Welcome back to the Rice Report: your up-to-the-minute guide to the exciting and confusing phenomenon of the ricer resurgence as of late!

Before I begin, I would like to apologize for the poor quality of the photos. I think my camera must have a special mode that I don’t know about. I was able to see this car perfectly fine in person, but for some reason whenever I tried to take a picture of it, it came out terrible and grainy. I really believe my camera was trying to protect me from ever having to see this car again. Anyways, on to the car.

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It’s Still 2003, Somewhere

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Apparently this far into our modern futuristic world they still sell hair gel, some men still use bleach only for the ends of said gelled hair, and I’m pretty sure Wal-Mart still stocks those stupid Gilligan hats, somewhere. This Miata is for that person. The person that thinks that Disturbed is the most modern form of aggressive music, and that phones with color displays are quite fancy. Continue reading

Spoiler Alert

In 2002 you were way into the Wright brothers.. or the Vin Diesel, well in 2007 I took a picture of it, and in 2012 I’m sharing it.

Pardon the awesome VGA images.