They Weren’t Kidding (Saturn Vue)

I remember when Saturn was really pushing the whole “we use plastic body panels” thing on everyone by showing commercials of people hitting their cars with golf balls. It was a pretty effective way of proving to us that the cars were indeed made of plastic. You know what would have been equally effective, guys? A time lapse of a Saturn Vue being parked in an uncovered driveway in Phoenix for a couple months.

This poor thing is disintegrating! I mean, rust is no fun I’m sure (luckily, we don’t have to deal with it here) but what are you supposed to do when your car starts turning into cocaine? I honestly don’t know the answer to that one. Buy new body panels maybe? Actually, that might be kind of neat. You could scrounge up a bunch of body panels in different colors and end up with the soccer mom version of a Harlequin Jetta.

Here’s another shot that really showcases how bad the body is:

And here is an age progression I have done to show what I believe the damage will look like by the end of the summer:

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About Mike Ross

I love anything you can drive. But I love it even more if it has a small block Chevy or Ford motor, a turbo, four wheel drive, is a hatchback, or was made in the 80s. My ideal car would be a combination of all of these things, and I'm working on building a time machine so I can go back to the 80's and convince Chevy and Ford to collaborate on a twin-engine, single turbo 4x4 XR4Ti/Fox Mustang/Third Gen F-body and hide one in a mineshaft for me to recover in brand new condition. Look for a blog post about it just as soon as it happens. Or maybe it already did, and I've already posted about it in the future and the internet just needs to catch up with it. Okay, my head hurts, never mind.